what's all that racket

[persnicketiest]

can't be a has been if you were only an almost was

Comments

[cauda]

i said she dresses like one

[persnicketiest]

you've definitely got her there

[cauda]

i know

want me to come over and wash your hair?

[persnicketiest]

thanks but i had my daily invalid spongebath already

[cauda]

alright

[persnicketiest]

too much for the phenom huh? finally learned to retreat?

[cauda]

[ she hates that nickname ]

all i can do is take you at your word g

[persnicketiest]

( good )

is that what's happening then

[cauda]

[ there is a long pause, long enough that his little twitter (oh, i am so sorry, x) notification chimes and tennis weekly's newest tweet pops up declaring: "finnish phenom dumped by coach al peterson after repeated losses"; the sub-headline also doesn't say her actual name, but contains a quote by her former coach — "i coach winners, i can't coach someone who doesn't want to dig deep and make sacrifices for her game" ]

i'm trying

[persnicketiest]

( he's in a bad mood already when he starts getting into it with internet strangers—plenty of men delusional enough to think they could even survive a serve from serena, and a couple of wannabe news outlets he tells to fuck off a lot.

eventually he's swamped enough that he just goes ahead and fires off a bunch of tweets his erstwhile publicist would have both shouted at him for and also cashed in on. easy to call them all racists (she's swedish you fucking nonce) and easier to pull attention to himself and his washed-up status. he absolutely lances al and his team, and the only thing he regrets is that his hand isn't in good enough shape yet to make some s-tier memes.

somewhere in the middle, because he doesn't even know if she has a publicist, let alone one smart enough to warn her, he texts her: )

he's a cunt. stay off twitter.

[cauda]

you stay off twitter

[persnicketiest]

( he's got a thread going that the biggest babies are piling into and he loves every moment of it. tennis has never been about sacrifice, any player worth their salt would know that—then again big man has only ever been a coach sooo~ )

ok mum

( but it's not enough so he puts in his headphones and ring-ring, lind... )

[cauda]

If I knew it would get you on the phone I would have fired him months ago.

[ she sounds so fucking tired. ]

[persnicketiest]

I was still high on oxy months ago.

( he sighs, realizing he's impulsively called her and now...hm. )

[cauda]

[ she snorts, shaking her head to herself. ]

I dunno, you might have been funny then. Be a nice change of pace.

[persnicketiest]

( he tries not to, but the laugh huffs out of him. )

I mostly slurred angrily at doctors.

( now he curses bloody murder at his pt torturer who seems to enjoy his pain. )

...You should've fired him a year ago.

[cauda]

Yeah.

[ she can't disagree. he was a shithead and a jerk but she was winning so maybe she needed a shithead and a jerk. that's what she always told herself at least.

then she didn't win because she was sick and he didn't let her rest and it was her fault, of course. especially when she kept not winning. she puts her cup down too heavy on the counter, wincing at the thud. ]

Hindsight, whatever. That immigrant work ethic fucked me over.

[persnicketiest]

Yeah.

( he also can't disagree. he puts twitter away, lets his head flop back down onto the pillow. holds his hand up toward the ceiling and watches as only two of his fingers actually bend when he asks them to. )

Still better to cut him loose now instead of after another year of his bullshit, though. Maybe you can fix whatever he did to your drop shot now.

[cauda]

My drop shot is not— [ gearing up to argue, she shuts her mouth so fast her teeth clack together.

she huffs an unhappy noise. ]

It used to be killer, huh. Maybe I'll find it back home in Finland.

[persnicketiest]

It was so annoying.

( he laughs, deep in his belly where it's unfamiliar and makes him feel a little dizzy. it was annoying: elegant and brutal and now he's back on twitter about it actually. better that than process this strange nostalgia for a time that wasn't that long ago, that he'll never get back to. )

As long as you steer clear of Sweden. I've heard it's a real shit hole.

[cauda]

My brother thinks if I win some big tournament, Helsinki will give me a key to the city.

[ stockholm has and she has it on her keychain like she is going to actually use it one day.

her blender whirrs to life before she mutes herself for the duration. ]

[persnicketiest]

( he snorts. )

Then you'll never ever hear the end of it.

[cauda]

[ with her mouth full: ]

It's the long game to give Sweden a Trojan horse in.

[persnicketiest]

( another deep laugh, in his throat. )

There's no way that didn't happen already.

[cauda]

If you come visit me at home, my dad can tell you all the wildest history stories.

[ both her parents are teachers. ]